Rune: Viking Warlord Review (PS2)

Better Than Skyrim

A huge open world filled with a large assortment of different enemies, weapons and landscapes enthused with a longboat-load of Viking lore and magical elements. What could possibly go wrong?

Rune is a game before its time, released in the first year of the PS2’s long, star-studded reign of the console kingdom. It had all the right ideas and elements to be a commercial success and go on to spawn countless sequels and HD remakes. Rune is a game that with the right backing and a different development team could have been a masterpiece. Unfortunately, it wasn’t.

Most of the time that I spent playing Rune: Viking Warlord, my screen looked like this…

This was then followed by another loading screen that informed me of the exact location it was loading the data from, just in case I needed to know. Not only did the loading take forever but it was also incredibly frequent. It’s mind-achingly frustrating when it takes 10 minutes to load up a laggy, excessively long cutscene, with zero plot value only to load again after it.

When I wasn’t waiting for the game, I was lost. Whether it be because nobody explained to me what button was the ‘PICK UP OBJECT’ button, or because the textures were so blocky I couldn’t see there was a pathway hidden in the cliffside, it was inevitable. At the very beginning of the game you are told to find Ulf, the sword master of the village and claim your sword. There is no map and no directional arrows and the villagers are about as useful as a non-alcoholic beer. Most of the game is spent wandering through the same area looking for even the slightest hint as to where to go.

When you eventually find Ulf, he informs you that to be a true Viking, you must best him in battle. He goes on to tell you that he is the most feared swordsman in the village, and is renowned for his skill. I was rather scared at this point as it was my first taste of Rune combat and he had quite the sales pitch. I felled him in one hit. One hit was all it took to best the most skilled warrior in the village. I laughed, I laughed so hard. This was going to be the easiest game I have ever played in all of my existence.

Throughout the game I learnt how to dismember my foes and beat them with their own limbs, I learnt how to jump off of tanned animal skin to reach high ledges and best of all, I learnt how to skip the cutscenes. This was one hell of an adventure, despite the fact that the voice acting was done in a public toilet by a chain-smoking Father Christmas and the graphics were drawn whilst on an especially rickety bus ride.

I definitely see myself returning to the land of Rune for another taste of mead-drinking, dismembering Viking warfare. I hope to complete this game, if I could only find out what my objective was. One day I will, and I shall become a true warrior of Odin myself.