Backflips, Wheelies & Fractured Ankles

I’m not a huge fan of dirt biking, motocross or any kind of motorcycle sport. I bought Crusty Demons based on the title imagining a hack n’ slash, and in a way, that’s what I got…

Crusty Demons was an online impulse buy. My basket had 9 items in, and I had to find something to round it off as the game I had planned to buy was out of stock everywhere and still proves near impossible to acquire (Earache: Extreme Metal Racing). I stumbled across Crusty Demons on the obtusely cheap section of the website and I knew it had to be.

Crusty Demons is a flips n’ tricks kind of game, somewhat similar to one of the many Tony Hawk clones that plagued the sixth generation of console gaming. As soon as the opening cutscene rolled I knew this venture into Game-land would be one to remember. The scene features a group of whom I can only assume to be the ‘Crusty Demons’ bargaining with the Devil, trading their souls for immortality. As unbelievable as it sounds they then change their minds after signing as they can still feel pain. Satan then creates trials for the bikers to complete to repossess their souls.

There’s quite a range of characters in this game, but they all come across as either racist or stereotypical. You have the ‘Dayuuuuum’ black guy, the honourable Asian, the American obsessed with guns and the thuggish Mexican in addition to a whole lot more. (Don’t think you’re excused Aussies). There’s also quite the mix of vehicles to choose, ranging from about 7 dirt bikes to mini pimp cars and ice cream trucks.

The gameplay itself is where the game starts to redeem its terrible story and weak characters. Crusty Demons is a brutal, open world point-fest with an enjoyable single player and incredible local multiplayer battles. For a trick game with about 4 different tricks, it has a lot of replayability as I found myself on a mission where the objective was to run down all the pimps in the city by crashing into their shins in a mini pimpmobile, each time rewarded with ‘PIMP HIT!’ written across the screen in giant yellow lettering.

The game also features an obscene amount of gore. You can mow down pedestrians akin to Grand Theft Auto, causing blood to splatter across the screen and your character. Where the real joy lies is when you crash or bail from your bike. The score system ranks you on which bones you managed to fracture or break, and how much blood you’ve lost. This can range from a broken elbow to breaking both your ankles, losing gallons of blood as well as breaking your neck. Of course this means nothing as your character is immortal, but it sure is a hell of a lot of fun.

Overall, Crusty Demons gets old very quickly, and is only really amazing if you
are playing the multiplayer score battles. There’s a lot of unlockables but the difference is mainly aesthetic – so it just doesn’t feel worth it.

Conclusion

‘Although fun at first, Crusty Demons is quick to lose its charm. Buy a Tony Hawk game instead.

Score

5/10