Sometimes You Gotta Bankrupt A Few Eggs To Make an Omelette

Greetings, team. Let me first bring you all together to explain why I have brought you all together. The answer is simple, revolution. This is a call to arms, or more than likely, a shout out to the pocket book and power of the almighty dollar, but not in the way we have grown accustom to. This is about fighting back against the oppression of the Triple A industry, about showing them that we’re not going to take their shit, and that if they don’t play right, we’ll take our toys and find another proverbial sandbox that is filled with much less proverbial cat droppings…and actual sand, not that almost perfectly round and course (yes sand can come in varying degrees of coursisty (yes coursisty is now a word)) stuff, something more akin to beach sand.

Over the years we’ve played some great games, haven’t we? Assassin’s Creed, Bayonetta, Metal Gear Solid: The Ones That Weren’t Raiden, Halo. What do all these games have in common, team? What makes them the same? Death. Loads of stylized and quite frankly, highly entertaining death, but that’s not the only thing. They’re all made by big companies, who we have all learned to love and hate in both equal measures.

We willingly stick to our favorite IPS, telling ourselves with each new installment, rending the heart and soul of our cherished franchises that the developers only do this because they love us, and that it’s our fault that we have to put up with on disc microtransaction, microtransactions in general, and paying full price for a game that is so broken it’s rendered nearly unplayable. That’s right, we’re the victims of Gaming Domestic Abuse, and though we may complain avidly on forums, in articles (self-reference), and via the social medias, we still keep coming back, time and time again.

“We’re sorry, EA, we won’t talk about how repetitive Madden is for another year, please don’t ruin Star Wars,” we cry.

Well, our long and tortuous run as the oppressed needs to end! 

Imagine, if you will, if no one, and I mean literally NO ONE, bought an EA title, or everyone who was subjected to Ubisoft’s broken Assassins Creed release immediately demanded a refund. Imagine a world, where Konami and Nintendo were forced into bankruptcy because customers refused to buy their products, what effect do you think that would have with other studios? I tell you, team, it would be something the likes of which we haven’t seen since that first time we saw a full on Super Saiyan transformation, and it would be just as powerful.

The industry likes to say they cater to their fans. They like to say that they listen to the criticism, and that they are doing what’s best for the consumer. If that were the case microtransactions would be a joke you tell when you want to sound “hip” and I wouldn’t even be here complaining as to why I desire to see certain developers to belly up. In fact, I wouldn’t be here at all, I’d have no purpose in life, no great battles to fight, no high calling, really it’s because of the terrible business practices and greedy tactics of Triple A companies that I even have the opportunity and desire to enter the gaming journalism world…no…mustn’t think like that, that’s what they want you to think, stay strong. The people need you.

Miniature existential crisis aside, I must give the devil his due. Triple A companies do produce good games, and for every online game that has server issues on release, there are two or three released that may need maybe one or two patches upon launch to be perfect, but a few good apples won’t save the bunch. If you’re unhappy with a studio, then show them by flexing the muscles that matter most to them, the ones that reach for your money to give to them. I loved Assassin’s Creed: Black Flag, it is to this date some of the most fun I’ve had in a single player game that wasn’t pornographic or From Software.

But with the Assassin’s Creed Unity, Watch Dogs, and turning AC into a yearly release, I refuse to touch anything they’re associated with, and that sucks cause The Division looks like my cuppa tea. Same with Konami, because of the whole Hideo Horrorshow. I haven’t played, nor will I play, Metal Gear Solid 5 unless some drastic changes are made, and don’t even get me started on EA. Let’s just say that 40+ of expanded universe lore and a work-out regime that I feel would give me that perfect Mandalorian bounty hunter body insured I was in the beta for Battlefront, but after it’s free “beta”, and I use the quotes because I personally feel that was more of a publicity demo for the game, I uninstalled Origin and cried myself to sleep for many a night, praying to whatever gods would listen that EA making Battlefront was just a joke that somebody had played out for too long, but in the long run, I can see every time that these companies are slammed online, hold my head up high, and say in a voice that I personally feel sounds like the white Morgan Freeman:

“Well, at least I didn’t pay for this”.